Cheech & Chong's Up In Smoke (1978)

Wherever you are in terms of weed smoking, this cult flick was a huge box office blast in 1978, which seems like ages ago now. Can you imagine it done nowadays? No way! Defnitely could have only happened in the 70's as at the time it was as close to legalizing weed in USA as it gets. In fact Jimmy Carter won the ticket to the White House two years before officially backing it up and even Hunter S. Thompson swallowed the bug. It's a real pity it never happened as Carter's aide was busted with a big load of snowflake and his progressive, liberal agenda was promptly flushed in the toilet when media caught wind of the scandal. In a way late 70's – although driven by everlasting, cocaine high – were the highest mark of countercultural dreams gone big – if we measure them purely in media and entertainment pitch. Cheech Martin & Tommy Chong could have never found a better time to pop up with their homegrown comedy style.

For many people "Up In Smoke" is the best one in whole Cheech & Chong's series and although it worked for me I have to say I personally found "Nice Dreams" to be much more of an inventive oddball, just dripping with this peculiar, stoner aura. Still, we cannot really go through Cheech & Chong's astonishing film career without bumping on their first, groundbreaking picture. It's cool, it's hilarious and it's definitely baked! How many times it's been ripped off afterwards it's hard to count and that includes recent lame, stoner shit. What makes "Up In Smoke" a wild card and prevents it from aging though is a genuine vocation behind it... this feel of auteur's loco so much buried in the 80's by the big studios cashing on countless clones of "Star Wars", "Jaws" and "The Exorcist". Even if decade under influence was almost over by the time Cheech & Chong caught up, few great movies have been made even as late as 1980-1981.



A plot of "Up In Smoke" is obviously as loose as high mind can be. Two amateur musicians meet casually somewhere around Los Angeles – one just crawled up from a ditch by the beach actually – and they immediately hit it by sharing a gigantic joint (packed partly with Mauie Wowie and partly with labradorian shit). Shortly they get so stoned that driving is impossible anymore and while cult line "I think we're parked, man" comes off of a screen we surely know this bender's gonna last and it does! But the adventures of two dropouts – Pedro de Pacas and Anthony, are not really addressed to any straight viewers, so beware! However, if you've reached for your dear bong or just finished a phat one, they'll leave you spaced out in no time. Among many silly scenes you'll witness a weird music rehearsal and you'll meet wasted Vietnam veteran, who unfortunately flips out while guys want to score some dope from him. You're also gonna drown in some very bizarre ideas like crossing USA-Mexico border in a car made out of liquid marijuana.

In the end you'll have to face a struggle between our anti-heroes and local police forces led by unforgettable sergeant Sedenko, always alert to bust the hipsters as key personalities of a drug-dealing network... and you'll see their gig on young talents night at The Roxy, including obscure californian New Wave and punk rock acts. A cool cat Chicano-black-street speak adds to the flavour making it one of the least pretentious picture of all times and while it contains some lightweight, countercultural agenda it should be watched mainly for these mythical 10 lbs of hysterical giggle. If you have the right attitude and give it a first try, it will definitely blow your mind with it's off-beat pacing and revised version of Marx Brothers humour. You need to know, that only few 60's/70's movies have gained such a cult following with time and while comedies among them are scarce, this is the top. A fantastic trip in glorious past of a truly entertaining cinema, which will grab every serious toker "by the boo boo".

Pink Angels (1972)

While 70's drive-in cinema is the one that doesn't lack cult oddities, there are flicks in this basket that will easily make all B-movies instructors drop their fruits. One of these peculiar pictures is called "Pink Angels" not without a reason as it overshadows a biker movie theme with genuine queer touch. As the legend says, the movie was made by a group of UCLA film students led by director Larry G. Brown, who later scored obscure, cult slasher "The Psychopath" (1975) and faded away just to re-emerge once from the depth in the 80's. It's definitely one of these rarities, that won't necessarily become a reason to pass a word about it to all your friends, but good enough to give it a try at home while toking up some good shit. I'd recommend it mostly to biker movie completists and gay community, not necessarily cross-excluding target groups!

In classic exploitative tradition we get a small bunch of burly bikers, who hit the road. This time it's a bit different though as we find out soon they are a gang of cross-dressers on the road to Los Angeles, where they hope to get some fun on a hectic drag queen party! Shopping is another thing they're into and real fever starts when their eyes catch some classy high heels, fancy dress or a new lipstick (very best scenes of the movie). However, life's not easy for a queer biker in the land of free and in order to survive in Nixon's America of christian values, they need to keep rather low profile... but that sometimes gets out of hand as the road adventures put them in danger of revealing their true identity to police forces, hookers, hotel porters and other bikers, who are dedicated to riding their choppers in full-blown aura of primal machismo!



This early example of queer exploitation (if such a fantasy ever made to be a subgenre) and definitely one of queer cinema unknown treaures is essentially a teasing biker movie with few laugh-out-loud scenes. The road this flick goes down is a typical genre scenario – the guys ride and have fun with obligatory love-in set in the middle – this time it's tweaked a bit and includes table cloth, red wine and cheese! The Man keeps an eye on the angels though – a kind of veering element for a biker movie, which resembles very much early blacksploitation flicks. Behind the scenes there are still forces of order, which are dead set to bury all long-haired freaks, weirdos, acidheads and queers six feet under.

This right wing agenda is personified in "Pink Angels" by a rigid US military general, residing in his anonymous, but very powerful office – we get to know him mostly be exposing flashes as he contributes very little to the action serving mostly as a metaphorical tool. He's majesty is deadly serious about his mission, always being shown with American flag in the background. Most of the time he talks to his people or takes orders from above, which is a countercultural false mirror of establishment's morality and politics. When our queens finally get to Los Angeles, chased by brutal bikers, with whom they just partied the day before leaving them wasted, but with a little bit of make-up, a die-hard recognition of traditional morality takes turn and slowly crawls out from underneath in order to bust their weird asses!

The President's Analyst (1967)

60’s not only paved the way for violent bursting gangster cinema and higly engaging auteur dramas tracking the widening generation crack, but also gave birth to a new sort of comedies playing or spoofing on middle class lifestyle, conservative beliefs and finally on their motherland – the counterculture. A reason inviting new forms was rapidly transforming market itself, into which big Hollywood productions suddenly couldn’t tap no more. When high budget lollipop musicals and melodramas were losing money, studio moguls were desperate to replace them with anything, that would keep them going, hence they were accepting ideas, which before would be turned down without even reading the script.

"The President’s Analyst" was one of these movies and although accepted for production by Paramount – a half-independent studio for Hollywood standards at that time – it was still subversive enough to make high-rolling fatties nervous. Written and directed by Theodore J. Flicker, till that time a well doing TV craftsman, it boiled up a whole range of creative ideas, that in theory would fry rebellious brains of Baby Boomers entering the cinema. However, soon after kicking off the production, reality shock sobered up the artist when FBI demanded their name to be dropped from the movie concerned about their image – since 1963 they were slowly becoming one of the most hated American institutions among the hipsters, acid heads and leftists, commonly accused of messing up with JFK kill. The names of key agencies in the script were hence replaced by silly sounding, but still effective in direct alluding – FBR and CBR.



Nevertheless, this exceptionally funny, off-beat comedy still managed to come across with it’s agenda standing out as one of the best genre movies of it’s time, which though initially flopped, developed a real cult with time. The plot concerns sudden shift in Dr. Schaefer’s life – a genuine New York psychiatrist played by James Coburn, strongly attached to his academic methods. He’s just passed a dilligence rundown, ordered by FBR and CBR, which made him effectively the official US president’s psychoanalyst. He promptly moves to Washington to start his new assignment, but after short period of high stress on-call work, due to being privy to the biggest national secrets he becomes extremly edgy and suspicious of everything around him developing heavy paranoia. Eventually he suffers a nervous breakdown and flees the capital with randomly met "typical American family". He heads to East Coast fearing for his life, which proves to be justified as FBR, CBR and dozen of other foreign intelligence agencies have just made him the most valuable man in the world by opening a hunt!

That’s when the movie blows into a whimsical and soaring social satire as Dr. Schaefer is jumped at the front of NY restaurant by secret agents and runs for his life passing casually Cafe Wha? and getting into the near parked flower power van. Hippies – acted by obscure psychedelic group Clear Light – become a perfect cover introducing him to the countercultural lifestyle soaked in weed, acid and rock music. These beautiful scenes with Clear Light are a real find for 60’s psych fans as the group recorded only one brilliant album for Elektra Records in late 1967 disbanding shortly afterwards, therefore their footage is extremly hard to find. There in fact we get to feed on 60’s culture exploits being loaded up with back-to-earth cliches, psychedelic wisdom and LSD freak-out scenes, all flashing through well built underground vs. overground undercurrent, which will fuel the rest of the movie with light-hearted, but hip wit.



As the intrigue carries on, we read this old anarchistic truth in "The President’s Analyst" – competition often gets in the way of itself, especially in killing business – when Dr. Schaefer luckily saves his life. In the end he’s gonna combat forces of repression using his natural talent for telling people the truth and effectively winning their side. Even if they are secret agents, they still need to be treated, which helps to unroot the seed of ultimate technocracy being planted behind the closed door by The Phone Company – a bizarre symbol of business machinery looking up to depersonalizing a free individual – when their head quarter is tactically wrecked by the doctor and his patients-friends… but the question remains, for how long it’s gonna stop the oppressors?

This terrific flick stands as one of the most hilarious 60’s projects by any standards, which gently lines up with such comedies as "I Love You Alice B. Toklas" (1968), "The Party" (1968), "The Magic Christian" (1971), but might be treated as a perfect companion for hippiesploitation flicks like "Wild In The Streets" (1968) or psychedelic sci-fi spoofs like "Barbarella" (1968) as well. No doubt it’s an artifact of it’s time, but very prophetic in pointing at all the side effects of modern political order. A must-see indeed!

Zombie Strippers (2008)

If you’ve gone through shitloads of classic genre movies, you definitely noticed that Lucio Fulci is the man, who made a first crossover between zombie genre and sexploitation in his cult classic "Zombie" (1979), pitched with a real market wit as a sequel to George A. Romero’s "Dawn Of The Dead" (1978). Honestly, I do not enjoy zombie movies a lot… still good ones come as a surprise. After all, it’s better to be nicely surprised than to be left truly disappointed. Saying this I have to admit I’ve had a lot of fun with trashy "Zombie Strippers", which delivers exactly what is spelled out in the title – topless & undead chicks stripping… and as they’re fuckin’ hot it makes your worthwhile. Is this movie funny? Definitely, even if jokes from time to time get flat-lame, cause what saves the day here is the unprentencious humour-nudity-gore formula. Who would actually believe, that so worn-out genre might still kick around and provide you such a giggle? Well, it does and at least it worked for me.

In the spirit of classic gore & nudity Fulci, director Jay Lee spins his flick around zombies, naked broads and machine gun overkill. It’s the nearest future and George W. Bush just banned public nudity making all strip clubs illegal (ho, ho, ho!)… while somewhere in Nebraska a top secret, governmental laboratory is researching a deadly chemo virus, that turns people into zombies. Soon situation sneaks out of control and elite, military Z-Squad is called in to solve the problem. Unfortunately, one of the Rambos gets bitten by an undead, making his way out ASAP in fear of being eliminated by his – till this point – combat companions. Before poor lad turns into zombie though, he gets to sneak into the underground strip club, ruled by metrosexual Ian (Robert Englund) and his Russian supervisor bitch, where rest of the action will take place.



Suddenly we’re in the middle of the action and we get to to see some sweet piece of ass as the gals come on stage and strip away their bikinis. The cast is pleasant with Jenna Jameson leading this gig, but all other actresses, either stuffed with silicone or not, are nicely kickin’ softcore eye-candy. When hard work turns into a nightmare and first stripper gets turned into a zombie, we’re jumping on a roller-coaster of better-or-worse ideas, how this will affect the business. As it occurs, nothing makes a better treat than spinning a tragedy into a buck-rolling machine, so when the owner takes the risk of keeping green coming with the brand new bloody zombie strippers show, that leaves the public ravishing – they want the undead chicks BADLY! This however effectively takes the wind off other strippers’ sails, who must jump on the bandwagon in order to keep the job. They work the floor as well, so when one is caught with a customer biting his dick off turning him and next the others into zombies, problems start to pile up. Initially, newly found undead customers are locked in the basement, but soon an orgy of terror will follow bringing justice to greedy fuckwads managing the club and all slut strippers themselves… hell yeah!

"Zombie Strippers" not only provides an overfill of zombies and nudes, but spoofs on all classic genre themes. We even find a homage to gangsploitation classic, "The Warriors" (1979), when one of the undead gals is rattling two bottles singing: "Warriors, come out to playyy-ayy!" So nice and kind of neat indeed. Although this is not the best exploitation revival flick, released recently, it definitely has a classic exploitation call and a lot of minor genre musings with twisted humour glazing on the top. As we might expect, it looks cheap, but not too cheap – something between "Blood Feast II" and "Planet Terror". The movie leaps from gore exploitation to comedy, but overlaps both with a healthy layer of nudity, which keeps it rolling when dialogue lines are getting sloppy (you don’t like nudity, don’t watch it just to complain afterwards). Some intellectual rocks like a scene with a stripper reading Nietzsche might seem blundering, but they don’t really spoil anything mostly drowning in the background in a moment they’re gone. Do you have to watch it? No, you’re not gonna lose anything, but if in the hood why not give it a sneak peek.

Cheech & Chong's Nice Dreams (1981)

If you ask me who the biggest heroes of the late 70’s and early 80’s were, I’ll give you the damned answer straight away – they were Cheech & Chong! Although this wicked duo started as a rock group, they never went big with their music and LPs they released eventually wound up stocking up bargain racks in music shops around the world! It didn’t happen untill they got into movies that their natural talent for smoking weed and making fully blown comedy gags finally shone through. As they burnt a big hole through US box office with their debut picture "Up In Smoke" (1978), they suddenly became America’s new hipster’s hipsters. Frenetic cult has followed, which slowed down only a bit in the late 80’s, but never actuallly died! Today Cheech & Chong are as strong as never carrying their freedom message everywhere they toke up!

At the top of my personal list, floating on the silk mattresses of heaven, there’s one wonder flick they scored for Columbia Pictures, called "Nice Dreams"! The only movie which made me laugh so much, that I actually got hiccup and became scared I’d have to get hospitalized. "Nice Dreams" is a third picture in Chech & Chong’s series and although many fans point up to "Up In Smoke" as "the masterpiece", at least the same number praises the value of "Nice Dreams" as the ultimate stoner joke (clapping)! In fact, there’s a lot of arguments supporting this thesis such as absolutely ground-breaking screenplay – a virtually flawless gig, which doesn’t leave any loop holes that might be potentially spotting the action! This comes along with Cheech & Chong’s high level, drug-fueled acting as exemplified by outstanding scene in the restaurant, which carries a strong resemblance to Marx Brothers unforgettable performances!



And last but not least there is a message of the movie itself. These characters might be dopers and dropouts, but at least they see clearly all the shit and hypocrisy of the modern world preferring to do their own thing than drown in it. Their lifestyle unveils a crucial, moral dilemma – Cheech & Chong are doing harmless thing, they’re smoking weed, which is punished by law, but on the other hand forbidden because the laws are unjust and rotten to the core! Police forces chase the bad guys around while not giving a shit about the laws themselves indulging in drugs whenever they can. It’s solely their position of power, which lets them do it without any scare, while local communities are hassled, prejudiced and cracked down on without a scruple. Cheech & Chong represent freedom of choice and the liberties fundamental for communities in every democratic society, while their opressors are power mongers interested in limiting them to minimum – eat shit & die, fuckers!

However, the story of "Nice Dreams" is a very intimate one! Cheech & Chong go around the town dealing dope from an ice cream truck, from time to time trying to score with some chicks, but the law executioners are constantly on their tail and will bust them as soon as they get to the source of their awesome weed. This in certain order leads to Crazy Jimmy character, who just invented a new system of growing very potent buds. This shit is in fact so strong that can turn people into lizards, about which sergeant Sedenko will find out very soon when tempted to quietly smoke it himself. Cheech & Chong’s business gets very good in the meantime – they even plan to buy a tropical island, which they would rule as the kings of the sun being praised with thousand joints every day (great gig, man). Though when they’re visting Jimmy’s grow to get more stuff, cops are doing a bust. In effect, they’re on the run now making it through Chinese restaurant (where they meet Donna, Cheech’s ex girlfriend and get coked up), hotel sex & violence adventure (where they meet the furious biker), psychiatric hospital (where they get to meet Timothy Leary and trip on acid) to finally land bled’n’dry in a strip club to entertain the ladies… cause nothing lasts (as Ken Kesey would say)!

"Nice Dreams" is definitely one of the best movies in it’s class. What am I talking about? It’s one of the best movies ever! It beats "La Dolce Vita", "Psycho" or "Zabriskie Point" and even "Mean Streets" or "Boogie Nights". It’s as good as "Reservoir Dogs", "Network", "Five Easy Pieces" and only slightly worse than "Easy Rider", "The Holy Mountain" or "Apocalypse Now"… so if you want to see something really ass-cracking, go for this stoner classic NOW and remeber that a toke with Cheech & Chong is a quality toke!